Ro (drblueface) wrote in entropia_ropes,

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Feeling Alien.

Every community I've been a part of seems like it's in a world of it's own. It only just really hit me yesterday how some of them really don't mesh together very well.

Example; in the pagan/spiritual community, no topic is barred. Some pretty explicit material comes up on a regular basis, and it's mostly taken in fun. Politics, cannibalism, incest and lower GI all in one. I've gotten so used to it that none of it phazes me.

Yesterday at work, a couple silly people came in not actually looking to buy anything. One of them was asking me about myself.

Please note-I have a standard response to whenever people ask me why my life has changed dramatically in any way. The answer is always 'I got better'.

Now... these people asked me if I was jewish, and I said 'not anymore'. And they asked me why... and my answer shot out before I could think about it.

Now, these people didn't seem all too conservative, but I think I may still have offended them inadvertantly.

My point is this; that I had this very strange, odd, wierd feeling. I felt like I was pitted with strange beings that spoke a foreign language, and had meaningless customs that I was expected to participate in. After they left, I kept thinking about it, and facial expressions started running through my brain with no real understanding. For a brief few minutes, I couldn't understand the difference between a grin and flaming rage. Nor why there was a difference.

It's also not as though I don't constantly feel alien anyways. Just now, it stuck out.
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